We all have images that we immediately see in our mind’s eye when we think of something. When I think of racism, the image that I see in my mind is of a young Geordi La Forge bound in chains. The sound I hear is the screams of a slave being whipped. The smell I think of is the smoke of a blacksmith as the aforementioned chains are forged and I imagine the feel of those chains as they’re riveted to my body.
But what does racism taste like? It turns out racism tastes exactly like maple syrup.
The Quaker Oats company recently “rebranded” Aunt Jemima. They decided that the Aunt Jemima brand was “offensive”, and something needed to be done about it. So, they changed the brand to the “Pearl Milling Company”.
I’m not sure exactly how they determined that “Aunt Jemima” was offensive. Though, it’s easy to imagine that it started with a complaint from a single black person. Joe Biden told us that there is no diversity among the black population and all black people think the same thing. And, white people have suspected all along that every black person knows every other black person and they all talk about us behind our backs. So, even if they’re not all thinking the same thing now, it would only be a matter of time before they were. That being the case, the people at Quaker Oats decided that they better do something about it.
At first glance, this might seem all well and good but let’s look deeper at the change.
In case you’re not paying attention, here’s where we are: A company whose logo is the whitest of white dudes is deciding how “black” to make one of their products.
They could have just rebranded it to “Aunt Becky” and called it done. Regardless of the caricature used for Becky’s image, no white person would have complained. And, even if they did, it would have been summarily dismissed as “white privilege”.
Or, they could have called it “Heather’s Milling Company”. But the names “Heather” and “Becky” are too white, and they wanted to keep some blackness as a nod to the previous brand’s black-and-offensive origins. Maybe they focus-grouped “Shantelle Milling Company” and “LaShonda Milling Company to get the public’s reaction. Nope, those are too black.
I’ve been around for nearly 60 years and when I think of someone named “Pearl”, I can only think of one person: Pearl Bailey. That’s not because I’m a racist, it’s because she’s the only person I’ve ever heard of with the name “Pearl”. In my admittedly limited number of observations, 100% of the people I know called “Pearl” are black. But, there are probably some white people named “Pearl” too. So, the name “Pearl” isn’t too black. It’s just black enough.
Now, about that term “milling company”. When I think of the term, “milling”, I don’t think of a grist mill. The definition that springs to my mind is “milling around”. The term “milling company” could easily refer to a group of inner-city black men loitering on street corners waiting to sell or score drugs. With at least two definitions, the term “milling company” isn’t too black. It’s just black enough.
On the surface. the term “Pearl Milling Company” appears to be innocent. Though, it could also be nearly as racist as “Aunt Jemima”. Not too racist though. Just racist enough.
But don’t worry Quaker Oats. You don’t need to be concerned that black people might read this and decide that your new brand is offensive as well. Because Joe Biden also told us that black people are too stupid to figure out how to get online. And if they can’t get online, then they can’t read this, so your secret is still safe.
